THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM

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THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM

GTAHater
IN THE SIMPSONS HALLOWEEN SPECIAL VII, ONE OF THE THREE “SIMULATIONS” (THE TREEHOUSE OF HORROR SERIES IS NON-CANON) INVOLVES AN EVIL TWIN IMPRISONED IN THE ATTIC, WHO LOOKS ALMOST LIKE BART, EXCEPT SUSPECTED OF A NATURAL BORN PROPENSITY FOR EVIL. THAT ACTUALLY HAS A BASIS IN SOCIOLOGICAL HISTORY. IN PAST CENTURIES, THEY DIDN’T HAVE THE TECHNOLOGY OR OTHER RESOURCES TO CARE FOR THOSE WHO WERE BORN DEFORMED, SO PARENTS USED TO VENT THEIR DISAPPOINTMENTS BY LOCKING ANY MALFORMED CHILDREN IN DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOMS, USUALLY ATTICS, WHERE THEY’D BE IMPRISONED FOREVERMORE. THAT BRINGS ME TO A RAZZIE CONTENDER THAT’S AT LEAST AS BAD AS “WHEN THE BOUGH BREAKS” FROM THIS VERY SAME WEEKEND.

EVERYBODY WHO’S PAID ATTENTION TO CINEMA IN THE 2010S DECADE KNOWS HOLLYWOOD HAS BEEN SENDING DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILIES INTO CREEPY OLD HOUSES WITH SUPERNATURAL SECRETS, AND CRITICS ARE USING “THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM” AS THE BIGGEST EVIDENCE TO PROVE TODAY’S CINEMA HAS NO MORE REASON TO WANDER INTO THOSE PLACES ANYMORE. WITH AN O FOR 7 SCORE ON THE TOMATOMETER A DAY AFTER OPENING, AN UNUSUALLY LOW 21% FLIXSTER POPCORN BUCKET SCORE, A RARE “D” ON CINEMASCORE, AND AN UNCOMMON "F" FROM STUCKMANN, IT’S OBVIOUS THAT THE FEW WHO SEE THIS SUPPOSEDLY WIDE RELEASE TRULY CAN’T PUT UP WITH IT.

SPEAKING OF ITS RELEASE, THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM HAS EVEN SCARIER BACKSTORY THAN THE FILM PROPER. WITHIN THE LAST FEW YEARS, RELATIVITY MEDIA FILED FOR CHAPTER 11 BANKRUPTCY, AND HAD TO SELL SOME OF ITS FILMS, INCLUDING THIS, “BEFORE I WAKE”, AND “KIDNAP”, IN ORDER TO SHALLOW OUT THEIR POSITION IN THE DEFICIT HOLE. SHORTLY LATER, THEY SCHEDULED THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM FOR A WEEK BEFORE THIS PAST APRIL. A SERIES OF CONFLICTS BETWEEN THE THREE FILMS IN LIMBO PUSHED IT FURTHER AND FURTHER DOWN THE LINE TO MID-NOVEMBER. UNLUCKILY FOR US, ROGUE PICTURES SNATCHED A DEAL AND PULLED DISAPPOINTMENTS FORWARD TO NOW.

FINALLY, I SHOULD MENTION THAT IT’LL DAMAGE KATE BECKINSALE’S CAREER WORSE THAN UNDERWORLD: AWAKENING, WHITEOUT, AND VAN HELSING. IT SHOULD BE CLEAR TO YOU THAT DISAPPOINTMENT IS PUTTING PUBLIC OPINION OF “THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM” VERY MILDLY. DO YOU THINK IT CAN OVERCOME ITS LACK OF MEDIA EXPOSURE AND MAKE IT AS A RAZZIE COMPETITOR? DISCUSS BELOW!
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Re: THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM

oiram
Stuckmann review: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpVEmyBr_Hg
Worst Actor - Johnny Depp (Just imagine the cruel irony of winning for the role that original got him his first Oscar nom.)

Worst Actress - Katherine Heigl (SHE MUST WIN!)

Worst Supporting Actor - Anthony Hopkins (If he is nominated, he'll break a Razzie record. If he wins, he'll break TWO records!)

Worst Supporting Actress - Kim Basinger (Basically in this movie because 9 1/2 Weeks, her first Razzie nomination.)

Worst Supporting Actress (nom) - Marcia Gay Harden (Jane Seymour got a nomination for the parody version of the role, so why not the real thing?)
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Re: THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM

Vits
It'll stay around 0% on R.T. without a consensus.
Follow me on Twitter @Vits_Chile
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