THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM

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THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM

GTAHater
IN THE SIMPSONS HALLOWEEN SPECIAL VII, ONE OF THE THREE “SIMULATIONS” (THE TREEHOUSE OF HORROR SERIES IS NON-CANON) INVOLVES AN EVIL TWIN IMPRISONED IN THE ATTIC, WHO LOOKS ALMOST LIKE BART, EXCEPT SUSPECTED OF A NATURAL BORN PROPENSITY FOR EVIL. THAT ACTUALLY HAS A BASIS IN SOCIOLOGICAL HISTORY. IN PAST CENTURIES, THEY DIDN’T HAVE THE TECHNOLOGY OR OTHER RESOURCES TO CARE FOR THOSE WHO WERE BORN DEFORMED, SO PARENTS USED TO VENT THEIR DISAPPOINTMENTS BY LOCKING ANY MALFORMED CHILDREN IN DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOMS, USUALLY ATTICS, WHERE THEY’D BE IMPRISONED FOREVERMORE. THAT BRINGS ME TO A RAZZIE CONTENDER THAT’S AT LEAST AS BAD AS “WHEN THE BOUGH BREAKS” FROM THIS VERY SAME WEEKEND.

EVERYBODY WHO’S PAID ATTENTION TO CINEMA IN THE 2010S DECADE KNOWS HOLLYWOOD HAS BEEN SENDING DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILIES INTO CREEPY OLD HOUSES WITH SUPERNATURAL SECRETS, AND CRITICS ARE USING “THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM” AS THE BIGGEST EVIDENCE TO PROVE TODAY’S CINEMA HAS NO MORE REASON TO WANDER INTO THOSE PLACES ANYMORE. WITH AN O FOR 7 SCORE ON THE TOMATOMETER A DAY AFTER OPENING, AN UNUSUALLY LOW 21% FLIXSTER POPCORN BUCKET SCORE, A RARE “D” ON CINEMASCORE, AND AN UNCOMMON "F" FROM STUCKMANN, IT’S OBVIOUS THAT THE FEW WHO SEE THIS SUPPOSEDLY WIDE RELEASE TRULY CAN’T PUT UP WITH IT.

SPEAKING OF ITS RELEASE, THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM HAS EVEN SCARIER BACKSTORY THAN THE FILM PROPER. WITHIN THE LAST FEW YEARS, RELATIVITY MEDIA FILED FOR CHAPTER 11 BANKRUPTCY, AND HAD TO SELL SOME OF ITS FILMS, INCLUDING THIS, “BEFORE I WAKE”, AND “KIDNAP”, IN ORDER TO SHALLOW OUT THEIR POSITION IN THE DEFICIT HOLE. SHORTLY LATER, THEY SCHEDULED THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM FOR A WEEK BEFORE THIS PAST APRIL. A SERIES OF CONFLICTS BETWEEN THE THREE FILMS IN LIMBO PUSHED IT FURTHER AND FURTHER DOWN THE LINE TO MID-NOVEMBER. UNLUCKILY FOR US, ROGUE PICTURES SNATCHED A DEAL AND PULLED DISAPPOINTMENTS FORWARD TO NOW.

FINALLY, I SHOULD MENTION THAT IT’LL DAMAGE KATE BECKINSALE’S CAREER WORSE THAN UNDERWORLD: AWAKENING, WHITEOUT, AND VAN HELSING. IT SHOULD BE CLEAR TO YOU THAT DISAPPOINTMENT IS PUTTING PUBLIC OPINION OF “THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM” VERY MILDLY. DO YOU THINK IT CAN OVERCOME ITS LACK OF MEDIA EXPOSURE AND MAKE IT AS A RAZZIE COMPETITOR? DISCUSS BELOW!
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Re: THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM

oiram
Stuckmann review: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpVEmyBr_Hg
Akiva Goldsman: The writer partially responsible for this year's triple threat of The Dark Tower, Rings, and, worst of all, Transformers: The Last Knight. I'll be shocked if all three screenplays do not make the ballots.

Worst Picture - Boo 2! A Madea Halloween (nom), The Emoji Movie (nom), Fifty Shades Darker, The Mummy (nom), 9/11 (nom), and Transformers: The Last Knight (nom)
Worst Actor - Tom Cruise (nom), Matt Damon (nom), Johnny Depp, Jamie Dornan (nom), Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson (nom), and Charlie Sheen (nom)
Worst Actress - Whoopi Goldberg (nom), Katherine Heigl, Dakota Johnson (nom), Tyler Perry (nom), Amy Schumer (nom), and Reese Witherspoon (nom)
Worst Supporting Actor - Jon Bass (nom), Anthony Hopkins, Eric Johnson (nom), Ben Kingsley (nom), Rob Lowe (nom), and John Turturro (nom)
Worst Supporting Actress - Kim Basinger, Faye Dunaway (nom), Laura Haddock (nom), Marcia Gay Harden (nom), Goldie Hawn (nom), and Isabela Moner (nom)
Worst Screen Combo - Any two robots, actors, or robotic actors (nom), Tom Cruise and either Sofia Boutella, Jake Johnson, or Annabelle Wallis (nom), The Entire Cast of Fifty Shades Darker, The Entire Cast of 9/11 (nom), The Entire Voice Cast of The Emoji Movie (nom), and Amy Schumer and Goldie Hawn/Snatched (nom)
Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-Off or Sequel - Baywatch (nom), CHiPs (nom), The Emoji Movie (Rip-Off of Inside Out, The Lego Movie, and Wreck-It Ralph) (nom), Fifty Shades Darker, The Mummy (nom), and Transformers: The Last Knight (nom)
Worst Director - Michael Bay (nom), James Foley, Martin Guigui (nom), Alex Kurtzman (nom), Tyler Perry (nom), and Guy Ritchie (nom)
Worst Screenplay - The Emoji Movie (nom), Fifty Shades Darker, The Mummy (nom), 9/11 (nom), Suburbicon (nom), and Transformers: The Last Knight (nom)
Redeemer: M. Night Shyamalan
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Re: THE DISAPPOINTMENTS ROOM

Vits
It'll stay around 0% on R.T. without a consensus.
Follow me on Twitter @Vits_Chile