IT PROMISED A WORLD OF SMOOTH, RICH SPACE BLOCKBUSTER ROMANCE FEATURING TWO OF THE HOTTEST NEW ACTORS OF THE DECADE, JENNIFER “KATNISS EVERDEEN” LAWRENCE AND CHRIS "STAR-LORD" PRATT. PEOPLE HELD HIGH HOPES THAT IT WOULD JOIN THE IMITATION GAME AS A MORTEN TYLDUM DIRECTED MASTERPIECE. THEIR FANS HAVE BEEN WAITING ALL YEAR LONG ON A HYPE TRAIN THAT DERAILED AT THE LAST MINUTE WHEN CRITICS STARTED GIVING IT A “D”... BECAUSE WHAT WE ENDED UP WITH WAS A TOTAL NIGHTMARE.
THE PROMOTIONAL MATERIALS AND THE TRAILER REPRESENTED THE BEGINNING OF THE PLOT AS A 12-DECADE JOURNEY THROUGH SPACE WHERE TWO CRYOGENIC HIBERNATION PODS MALFUNCTIONED AND OPENED ONLY 3 DECADES IN, 9 DECADES TOO EARLY. THEY SAID PRATT AND LAWRENCE WOULD BE PART OF AN EPIC ROMANCE WHERE THEY’D BE FACED WITH THEIR OWN HOPELESS MORTALITY. DESPITE THE SPACECRAFT’S IMAGINATIVE SHAPE, THE SPECIAL EFFECTS SOON CAME INTO QUESTION. THEN, ANOTHER BOMBSHELL. AS IT TURNS OUT, PRATT’S CHARACTER GETS BORED AND LONELY WHEN ONLY HIS POD MALFUNCTIONS, AND IN ONE OF THE MOST SELFISH MOVES IN THE HISTORY OF NEGATIVELY-REVIEWED CINEMA, HE OPENS LAWRENCE’S POD AND SEALS HER DOOM JUST LIKE HIS OWN, JUST SO HE’LL HAVE SOME COMPANY. NOT ONLY DOES HE NOT THINK THROUGH WHETHER THIS COMPANION WILL BE FRIENDLY WITH HIM, BUT WHAT FOLLOWS IS ANOTHER CREEPY STALKER AND STOCKHOLM SYNDROME STORY WHICH, UNLIKE SOME OTHER RAZZIE-GRADE FILMS LIKE THE BOY NEXT DOOR AND WHEN THE BOUGH BREAKS, AUDIENCES DIDN’T SIGN UP FOR! BUT PERHAPS THE WORST ELEMENT OF THE WHOLE FILM IS THE 3RD ACT, WHEN THE SHIP STARTS TO GET DESTROYED, AND WHATEVER HEROES MAY RISE ENGAGE IN STUNTS THAT CALL BACK TO MUCH BETTER FILMS LIKE 2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY (ANCIENT TOP 30 MOVIES OF ‘968), GRAVITY (TOP 40 FILMS OF ‘013), AND THE MARTIAN (TOP 40 FILMS OF ‘015), BUT PASSENGERS ISN’T EVEN A PASSABLE IMITATION OF THOSE!
IF YOU CAN ARGUE FOR WHY THIS SHOULD BE A HIGHER PRIORITY FOR THE RAZZIES THAN FELLOW 12-21-016 RELEASE ASSASSIN’S CREED (WHICH HAS EVEN LOWER REVIEW SCORES), PASS JUDGMENT ONTO PASSENGERS BELOW!
So about why it could be more deserving than Assassin's Creed. First off, this one's original, and when an original film is bad, that usually hurts worse because there might have been some potential, I mean not all the time when there are things like Nine Lives, but still. Also, when an original film is bad and it ends up not doing well, Hollywood then thinks they have to rehash instead.
But like I said earlier, lets not forget the fact that it was supposed to be this big blockbuster, as it has two of the newest and hottest (their words, not mine) young stars as a couple, Jennifer Lawrence and Chris Pratt. However, it's looking like those aspirations have fizzled out, and such a loss can be pounced upon.
Please let Robert De Niro finally be nominated for Worst Actor.
Please do not Razz Ben Affleck this year, at least, because there are others more deserving.
If no one will make this a quote, I will: Emily Blunt played the worst ice based character since Martin Short as Jack Frost and, before that, Arnold Schwarzenegger as Mr. Freeze.
So about why it could be more deserving than Assassin's Creed.
Why do we have to choose? It's true that the last releases of each year have less chances of getting nominated, but plenty of them still go to the ballots. I still remember when all the wide releases of the last week of 2013 made it to the ballots.
So basically the acting itself is all right, the problem is with the story? Because then it shouldn't be considered for Worst Actor/Worst Actress, but more for Worst Screenplay/Worst Movie or Worst Director.
Fernando Marambio (2/7): "Luckily, Jennifer Lawrence brings out the required sensitivity to save a character less convincing than WILSON, the ball that accompanied Tom Hanks in CASTAWAY. [...] Cute and likeable, they look more like a pair ready to party than a couple facing loneliness. [...] The dissapointing part of the movie is that, after a promising start, it loses its way until it crashes with an abrupt and emotionless ending. Its director, Morten Tydlum (responsible for THE IMITATION GAME) seems like a castaway who threw a bottle into the sea with a blurry message. There's no way the guy can be rescued."
Which is still above the star-studded feelgood gloop of Collateral Beauty (that's at 13%), but still bad for a movie that the studio was probably hoping would be a box office hit like Gravity or Interstellar.
Antonio Martínez (2/5): "Norwegian Morten Tydlum, director of THE IMITATION GAME, in his first movie filmed at Hollywood, clearly establishes the thing that matters the most: Avalon, the spaceship. In this character, the great film industry shows its merits and engineering. It's spectacle and imagination. Its architecture, volumes and visual effects. However, the problem is that this isn't aeronautics. If you remove the spaceship from the equation, what's left is a mediocre movie."