COLLIDE

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COLLIDE

oiram
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SOMETIMES, WE HAVE MOVIES THAT COME OUT, AND THEY JUST FEEL LIKE THEY ARE TRYING TO BE RAZZIE NOMINATED. I KNOW THAT PHRASE SOMETIMES GETS TOSSED AROUND TOO LIBERALLY, BUT IN THE CASE OF COLLIDE, IT FEELS LIKE A LEGITIMATE THING TO SAY.

IN THIS MOVIE COLLIDE, WHICH WAS SHOT IN 2014 AND THEN DELAYED MULTIPLE TIMES IN THE STATES, WE HAVE A PLOT WHERE NICHOLAS HOULT AND FELICITY JONES, OBVIOUSLY BOTH DOING THIS FILM BECAUSE THEY WERE NOT AS BIG IN THEIR CAREERS AT THE TIME, FALL IN LOVE, WHICH CAUSES HOULT'S CHARACTER TO STOP DEALING DRUGS. HOWEVER, WHEN JONES' CHARACTER NEEDS A KIDNEY TRANSPLANT AND THEY DO NOT HAVE THE MONEY, HOULT'S CHARACTER DECIDES TO TAKE ONE LAST JOB FROM HIS BOSS, PLAYED BY OSCAR WINNER AND TWO TIME RAZZIE NOMINEE BEN KINGSLEY, BUT THE JOB IS BOTCHED AND NOW HOULT'S CHARACTER IS ON THE RUN FROM HIS BOSS' BOSS, PLAYED BY OSCAR WINNER AND ONE OF THE FIRST EVER RAZZIE NOMINEES, ANTHONY HOPKINS. FROM THERE ON, JONES' CHARACTER GETS KIDNAPPED AND HOULT'S CHARACTER HAS TO SAVE HER, WHICH IS BASICALLY AN EXCUSE TO HAVE A BUNCH OF CARS DRIVE AND CRASH. MATTER OF FACT, THE WHOLE MOVIE IS AN EXCUSE TO HAVE A BUNCH OF CARS DRIVE AND CRASH.

WITH THAT OUT OF THE WAY, THE FILMMAKING IS PRETTY POOR. THOUGH SOME STUNT WORK DOES LOOK WELL DONE, SOME CGI CARS LOOK BAD, ADR WORK IS NOTICEABLE, AND SOME OF THE FOOTAGE IS BADLY EDITED. THE MOVIE ALSO DOESN'T MAKE SENSE AS A SCRIPT. FOR EXAMPLE, HOPKINS' CHARACTER IS SUPPOSED TO BE SOMEONE IN THE BACKGROUND AND NO ONE COULD LEGALLY ARREST HIM, BUT HE ACTUALLY ENDS UP DOING SOME OF THE DIRTY WORK HIMSELF, AND IN AREAS WHERE SURVEILLANCE CAMERAS WOULD BE PRESENT. ALSO, THE ELEMENTS IMPLEMENTED INTO THE PLOT JUST MAKE IT FEEL LIKE THE MOVIE HAS NO IDEA WHAT IT WANTS TO BE.

"BUT WHAT IS IT THAT MAKES COLLIDE SEEM LIKE A MOVIE THAT WANTS TO BE RAZZIE NOMINATED" YOU MAY ASK? WELL, NOT ONLY ARE THE TWO VILLAINS PLAYED BY PREVIOUSLY RAZZIE NOMINATED ACTORS, BUT THEY ALSO ACTUALLY MAKE REFERENCES TO RAZZIE ICONS! IN KINGSLEY'S CASE, NOT ONLY DOES HIS CHARACTER LIKE WATCHING THE RAZZIE NOMINATED JOHN TRAVOLTA MOVIE PERFECT, BUT HE ALSO HAS THIS ODD, BOARDING ON SEXUAL, FASCINATION WITH RAZZIE PERENNIAL, BURT REYNOLDS. AS FOR HOPKINS, HE ACTUALLY DOES AN IMPRESSION OF THE RAZZIE CHAMP, SYLVESTER STALLONE! CAN YOU BELIEVE SUCH A THING WOULD EVER HAPPEN?!

THIS MOVIE JUST SCREAMS "GIVE US RAZZIES!!!" BUT WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK? DOES THIS FILM DESERVE TO "COLLIDE" WITH THE AWARDS?
Akiva Goldsman: The writer partially responsible for this year's triple threat of The Dark Tower, Rings, and, worst of all, Transformers: The Last Knight. I'll be shocked if all three screenplays do not make the ballots.

Worst Picture - Boo 2! A Madea Halloween (nom), The Emoji Movie (nom), Fifty Shades Darker, The Mummy (nom), 9/11 (nom), and Transformers: The Last Knight (nom)
Worst Actor - Tom Cruise (nom), Matt Damon (nom), Johnny Depp, Jamie Dornan (nom), Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson (nom), and Charlie Sheen (nom)
Worst Actress - Whoopi Goldberg (nom), Katherine Heigl, Dakota Johnson (nom), Tyler Perry (nom), Amy Schumer (nom), and Reese Witherspoon (nom)
Worst Supporting Actor - Jon Bass (nom), Anthony Hopkins, Eric Johnson (nom), Ben Kingsley (nom), Rob Lowe (nom), and John Turturro (nom)
Worst Supporting Actress - Kim Basinger, Faye Dunaway (nom), Laura Haddock (nom), Marcia Gay Harden (nom), Goldie Hawn (nom), and Isabela Moner (nom)
Worst Screen Combo - Any two robots, actors, or robotic actors (nom), Tom Cruise and either Sofia Boutella, Jake Johnson, or Annabelle Wallis (nom), The Entire Cast of Fifty Shades Darker, The Entire Cast of 9/11 (nom), The Entire Voice Cast of The Emoji Movie (nom), and Amy Schumer and Goldie Hawn/Snatched (nom)
Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-Off or Sequel - Baywatch (nom), CHiPs (nom), The Emoji Movie (Rip-Off of Inside Out, The Lego Movie, and Wreck-It Ralph) (nom), Fifty Shades Darker, The Mummy (nom), and Transformers: The Last Knight (nom)
Worst Director - Michael Bay (nom), James Foley, Martin Guigui (nom), Alex Kurtzman (nom), Tyler Perry (nom), and Guy Ritchie (nom)
Worst Screenplay - The Emoji Movie (nom), Fifty Shades Darker, The Mummy (nom), 9/11 (nom), Suburbicon (nom), and Transformers: The Last Knight (nom)
Redeemer: M. Night Shyamalan
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Re: COLLIDE

Vits
Jeremy Jahns' video review.
oiram wrote
NICHOLAS HOULT AND FELICITY JONES, OBVIOUSLY BOTH DOING THIS FILM BECAUSE THEY WERE NOT AS BIG IN THEIR CAREERS AT THE TIME
She wasn't, but he had already been in X-MEN: 1ST CLASS, WARM BODIES and JACK THE GIANT SLAYER (not exactly a great movie, but a blockbuster with him as the lead).
Follow me on Twitter @Vits_Chile
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Re: COLLIDE

oiram
Chris Stuckmann's video review.
Akiva Goldsman: The writer partially responsible for this year's triple threat of The Dark Tower, Rings, and, worst of all, Transformers: The Last Knight. I'll be shocked if all three screenplays do not make the ballots.

Worst Picture - Boo 2! A Madea Halloween (nom), The Emoji Movie (nom), Fifty Shades Darker, The Mummy (nom), 9/11 (nom), and Transformers: The Last Knight (nom)
Worst Actor - Tom Cruise (nom), Matt Damon (nom), Johnny Depp, Jamie Dornan (nom), Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson (nom), and Charlie Sheen (nom)
Worst Actress - Whoopi Goldberg (nom), Katherine Heigl, Dakota Johnson (nom), Tyler Perry (nom), Amy Schumer (nom), and Reese Witherspoon (nom)
Worst Supporting Actor - Jon Bass (nom), Anthony Hopkins, Eric Johnson (nom), Ben Kingsley (nom), Rob Lowe (nom), and John Turturro (nom)
Worst Supporting Actress - Kim Basinger, Faye Dunaway (nom), Laura Haddock (nom), Marcia Gay Harden (nom), Goldie Hawn (nom), and Isabela Moner (nom)
Worst Screen Combo - Any two robots, actors, or robotic actors (nom), Tom Cruise and either Sofia Boutella, Jake Johnson, or Annabelle Wallis (nom), The Entire Cast of Fifty Shades Darker, The Entire Cast of 9/11 (nom), The Entire Voice Cast of The Emoji Movie (nom), and Amy Schumer and Goldie Hawn/Snatched (nom)
Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-Off or Sequel - Baywatch (nom), CHiPs (nom), The Emoji Movie (Rip-Off of Inside Out, The Lego Movie, and Wreck-It Ralph) (nom), Fifty Shades Darker, The Mummy (nom), and Transformers: The Last Knight (nom)
Worst Director - Michael Bay (nom), James Foley, Martin Guigui (nom), Alex Kurtzman (nom), Tyler Perry (nom), and Guy Ritchie (nom)
Worst Screenplay - The Emoji Movie (nom), Fifty Shades Darker, The Mummy (nom), 9/11 (nom), Suburbicon (nom), and Transformers: The Last Knight (nom)
Redeemer: M. Night Shyamalan
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Re: COLLIDE

oiram
I'm pretty sure this film is deserving of more attention from us right now. It didn't even make the top ten!
Akiva Goldsman: The writer partially responsible for this year's triple threat of The Dark Tower, Rings, and, worst of all, Transformers: The Last Knight. I'll be shocked if all three screenplays do not make the ballots.

Worst Picture - Boo 2! A Madea Halloween (nom), The Emoji Movie (nom), Fifty Shades Darker, The Mummy (nom), 9/11 (nom), and Transformers: The Last Knight (nom)
Worst Actor - Tom Cruise (nom), Matt Damon (nom), Johnny Depp, Jamie Dornan (nom), Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson (nom), and Charlie Sheen (nom)
Worst Actress - Whoopi Goldberg (nom), Katherine Heigl, Dakota Johnson (nom), Tyler Perry (nom), Amy Schumer (nom), and Reese Witherspoon (nom)
Worst Supporting Actor - Jon Bass (nom), Anthony Hopkins, Eric Johnson (nom), Ben Kingsley (nom), Rob Lowe (nom), and John Turturro (nom)
Worst Supporting Actress - Kim Basinger, Faye Dunaway (nom), Laura Haddock (nom), Marcia Gay Harden (nom), Goldie Hawn (nom), and Isabela Moner (nom)
Worst Screen Combo - Any two robots, actors, or robotic actors (nom), Tom Cruise and either Sofia Boutella, Jake Johnson, or Annabelle Wallis (nom), The Entire Cast of Fifty Shades Darker, The Entire Cast of 9/11 (nom), The Entire Voice Cast of The Emoji Movie (nom), and Amy Schumer and Goldie Hawn/Snatched (nom)
Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-Off or Sequel - Baywatch (nom), CHiPs (nom), The Emoji Movie (Rip-Off of Inside Out, The Lego Movie, and Wreck-It Ralph) (nom), Fifty Shades Darker, The Mummy (nom), and Transformers: The Last Knight (nom)
Worst Director - Michael Bay (nom), James Foley, Martin Guigui (nom), Alex Kurtzman (nom), Tyler Perry (nom), and Guy Ritchie (nom)
Worst Screenplay - The Emoji Movie (nom), Fifty Shades Darker, The Mummy (nom), 9/11 (nom), Suburbicon (nom), and Transformers: The Last Knight (nom)
Redeemer: M. Night Shyamalan